Lesson 2.04 Investing in Emotions

Passage #1

Lizzie was a little girl who didn't like to brush her teeth. Her mom tried to explain that if she didn't brush she would get a cavity. One day Lizzie ate a piece of hard candy. When she bit down on it, pain shot through her mouth. "Oh, no! Mom was right!" she thought. Lizzie's mom made an appointment with her dentist and took Lizzie in for a checkup the next morning. The doctor asked Lizzie how her tooth felt. He took out a few tools and examined each tooth carefully. Lizzie didn't have a cavity, but she did have a month's worth of food stuck in between her gums and teeth. From that moment on, Lizzie brushed her teeth twice a day.

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Passage #2

Lizzie, cute as a button, was a feisty, little girl who didn't like to brush her teeth.
"Lizzie, if you don't brush your teeth every day, your teeth will rot like bananas. You don't want a cavity!" her mom pleaded.
Lizzie crunched on a million pieces of sweets from cotton candy, candy corn, jawbreakers, to Jolly Ranchers.
"Eeeyouch!" Lizzie screamed. Pain exploded through her mouth like a time bomb that just detonated.
"Oh, no! Mom was right!" she thought as her face collapsed as if it were a pricked balloon.
Lizzie's mom made an appointment with Dr. Scott for a checkup the next morning.
"Lizzie, how does your tooth feel today?" the doctor asked as he began to examine each tooth carefully.
"It's okay," Lizzie responded, knowing that her tooth was still throbbing.
Lizzie listened to the splatter of the water and slurp of the suction as she nervously awaited the news.
"Lizzie, you don't have a cavity," observed Dr. Scott.
She was on cloud nine when she heard the news. However, Dr. Scott hadn't finished his report.
"You don't have a cavity, but you do have a month's worth of food stuck in between your gums and teeth like a squirrel packing his cheeks for storage."
From that moment on, Lizzie was an eager beaver and brushed her teeth at least twice a day.

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Comparing the Two Passages

The two passages have the same character and events in them, so why are they different?

• Passage #1 tells about Lizzie's problem matter-of-factly.
• Passage #2 includes details to help the reader understand Lizzie's experience. You should have noticed the use of figurative language in Passage #2.

You learned about similes and metaphors in a previous lesson. In this lesson, you will incorporate other types of figurative language to help you spice up your writing.

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