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Bullying

Definition

Stopbullying.gov defines bullying as “any unwanted aggressive behavior(s) by another youth or group of youths that involves an observed or perceived power imbalance and is repeated multiple times or is highly likely to be repeated.”

Effects

When bullying occurs, the well-being of both targeted children and those who bully is negatively impacted. Bullying is associated with depression, self-harm, academic issues, headaches, suicide, domestic violence, and criminal behavior later in life. Those who are bullied often do not report it because they fear retaliation or being a tattletale.

Types

Bullying takes place verbally, socially, and physically. Face-to-face verbal and physical attacks are more typical of boys. Girls are more likely to bully indirectly through rumors, exclusion, and cyberbullying. Bullying decreases as students mature, with the highest incidence occurring during elementary school and the lowest rates toward the end of high school.

Susceptibility

Characteristics of an individual’s family, school, community, and peers can either protect someone from bullying or make them more vulnerable to it. Positive, close relationships with parents, peers, and significant adults, and a connected, safe neighborhood and school protect children from bullying. Children whose parents are drug abusers, are in jail, or mistreat them are more likely to bully and be bullied.

Risk

Individual characteristics also influence the risk of bullying. Those who have poor social skills, are socially isolated, have a disability, or are gay are more likely to be bullied. People who are quick-tempered and have violent peers are more likely to bully, while those who are passive are more likely to be targets. Having at least one friend protects people from bullying. Those who feel supported by their peers have fewer negative effects as a result of bullying.

Preventing Bullying

Everyone can decrease bullying by promoting pro-social, non-violent norms in the home, school, and community. Talk about bullying, why it happens, and how to prevent it. Step up when bullying happens. Promote a sense of calm, fairness, and kindness. Protect victims. Understand those who bully are often troubled and bullied by others.

Creating a culture that promotes kindness and stops bullying helps everyone feel safe and supported. Feeling safe and supported can decrease self-harm and suicide.

Self-Harm

What is Self-Harm?

The act of physically hurting oneself is called self-harm. People harm themselves in a variety of ways and for different reasons. Common forms of self-harm include cutting or mutilating the skin and reckless, dangerous behavior that is likely to cause injury.

Self-harm is often associated with a history of emotional or sexual abuse, or with mental illness. Acts of self-harm are generally not intentional suicide attempts, but are done to feel some relief from emotional pain. Many people who self-harm state that the inflicted physical injury provides some release of long-term emotional pain.

Long-Term Problems

While self-harm sometimes brings temporary relief from distress, it causes more problems in the long run. It can become an addictive habit. You can hurt yourself more seriously than you intend, causing long-term injury or death. Long-term self-harm is associated with higher rates of depression, substance abuse, and suicide. Self-harm is often a way of avoiding dealing with negative emotions, which means the emotional triggers that lead to self-harm don’t get addressed and resolved.

Getting Help

Replacing self-harm with positive coping mechanisms can protect your health. If you are self-harming, talk to a trusted adult who can support you and guide you to positive coping strategies. Examine your self-harming behaviors and the triggers that make you want to self-harm. Identify strategies to manage your triggers. Seek professional help as needed. Your parents, counselor, or doctor can help you find the help you need.

For more information about self-harm and getting help, visit How to Deal with Self-Harm at Crisis Text Line.

Suicide

A Call for Help

The most tragic way a person can harm themselves is taking their own life. Acts of suicide are calls for help. Most people do not want to die, but want the pain to stop. Many who attempt suicide have experienced a traumatic loss, or are struggling with depression or other forms of mental illness.

Who Attempts Suicide?

Suicide is more common in people who abuse drugs and alcohol, behave aggressively, are mentally ill, or live in a home or community characterized by violence and conflict. According to the CDC, girls attempt suicide more often than boys, but boys die of suicide more often than girls. This is because boys tend to use more lethal forms of suicide, such as guns, while girls use less lethal means, such as overdosing on pills.

Adolescent Suicide

Suicidal behavior in adolescents is often an impulsive response to a traumatic experience or a major disappointment. Sometimes adolescents find it difficult to look to the future beyond a broken heart. A breakup, death, move, divorce, or violent experience can be a trigger for a suicide attempt. It can be difficult, in the midst of pain, to recognize these circumstances are temporary and life will get better.

Mental Illness and Suicide

Data also indicates a strong link between mental illness and suicide. According to the Jason Foundation, mental illness and addiction are related to 90% of suicides. They also state those who previously attempted suicide are eight times more likely to try again.

Watch this video to learn about one family story with suicide.

Open Suicide Prevention: One Family’s Story in a new tab

Who is Less Likely to Commit Suicide?

People who are able to practice effective problem solving and coping strategies are less likely to commit suicide. Supportive relationships with family and friends, connections to community, social, and school organizations, and access to quality physical and mental health care decrease rates of suicide. Suicide is less likely when people do not have access to guns and other deadly weapons. Those who object to suicide on a moral basis are also less likely to harm themselves.

Warning Signs

People who are considering suicide frequently warn others before acting on their suicidal thoughts. People often say or write things that show they could be thinking of harming themselves. Statements such as, “I wish I were dead,” or “They will be sorry for what they did when I am gone,” should be taken as serious threats.

Behaviors that might be associated with suicidal thoughts include withdrawal from friends, reckless behavior, excessive sleeping, not bathing, decreasing performance in school or athletics, and an obsession with death.

A person who has decided to commit suicide sometimes appears more content and peaceful because they anticipate an escape from pain. They might give away prized possessions and say things like, “I won’t need it anymore.”

Suicide Prevention

Suicide is preventable. Learn to recognize the signs of suicide in yourself and others. Talk. Listen. Stay with someone who is threatening suicide. Ask questions. Ask if someone is considering self-harm or suicide.

Tell a trusted adult immediately. Get professional help. If someone says, “Promise you won’t tell,” tell anyway. Even if you promised not to tell, if a person is threatening to harm themselves or someone else, tell a trusted adult immediately. You can go to a teacher, school counselor, parent, or another trusted adult. Always take a threat of harm to self or others seriously. People who attempt suicide and survive typically state they are glad they did not die.

What Can Be Done?

What makes people want to harm themselves? Escape from emotional pain is the primary reason people harm themselves.

What can be done to prevent these tragedies? Building connections with family members, peers, and supportive adults can provide protection from self-harm. Adult supervision decreases the risk for self-harm and suicide, so stay connected to your parents and other supportive adults. Get involved in organizations that promote positive activities and good choices. Talk with trustworthy peers and adults who can help you with your struggles. Be kind to yourself and others.

If you or someone you are with is threatening suicide, tell someone you trust NOW.

Tell a parent, teacher, counselor, or another adult you trust.

More information is available in Alabama at the Suicide Prevention Resource Center.